Category Archives: Random

Justifying our decisions

I’ve never quite understood nor tolerated what I assumed to be dishonesty or lies.

It frustrated me to no end. Why couldn’t my friends be truthful to me? Why do they contradict themselves constantly? How did they go from being adamant about their views to switching to the other side as though they weren’t just insisting on the opposing views the last time we met?

Today, I finally realized that perhaps it wasn’t dishonesty nor lies. Perhaps they were simply trying to convince themselves of their decision.

Just like I did.

Before I decided to go back to full time employment, I constantly came up with justifications on why freelancing was working out well for me.

Yes it didn’t pay as well but money isn’t everything
I have enough to get by;
I don’t have to get out of my pyjamas all day;
I don’t have to deal with peak hour crowds;
I manage my own schedule;
I spend more time with LF;
I have the flexibility to pursue my interests;
I am happier in general;
I sleep so much better;
I am enjoying and utilizing my home which I paid so much for (so much being subjective). Look at all those beautiful houses that are empty most of them time because the people who bought them were busy working to pay off their mortgages.

Yada yada yada.

But once I made the decision to head back into the corporate world just two weeks ago, I found myself coming up with new justifications which contradicted my earlier justifications for freelancing. Because I was trying to convince myself that I was doing the right thing for myself and that it was what I wanted.

I can’t tell which made more sense nor which is better but justifying my decision gave me some semblance of control. Like I knew what I was doing with my life.

So I’m sorry to all whom I assumed had lied and were dishonest with themselves and/or me. Like me, you were possibly also struggling to make sense of your decision and your life.

An inch closer

Truly, the universe conspires to help us. It’s like what Steve Jobs once said: “You can’t connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something — your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever.”

I randomly came across the book Little Princes: One Man’s Promise to Bring Home the Lost Children of Nepal a couple of days back and while the content of the book has little relevance to my new found realization, the questions and thoughts I had from reading the book did. It led me to the realization that I am probably on the right track despite being clueless on my direction and purpose in life. It matters not that I have not found my purpose in life as long as I keep moving forward. Living according to my beliefs and to continuously search, learn, explore and improve myself. One day, I will be able to connect the dots looking backwards.

Though I may not be contributing to the world in a meaningful way right now, I’m an inch closer.

 

 

 

Because “I’ve had enough of dating the bad boys and this is the man I’m gonna marry”

On an extremely random note, it suddenly hit me that using an iPhone is kinda like settling down with the one. When we were younger, we were (sort of) attracted to the bad boys. Guys that were exciting, different and possibly better looking. We lived with their flaws and volatile tempers silently believing that it was an one off occurrence. But as we grew older, we realise that what makes us happy is someone who is simple and sincere. A guy that we can trust and rely on. One who doesn’t change drastically forcing us adjust ourselves from time to time to suit them. Someone who put us before themselves.

That’s Apple and their iPhones (and of course products). I don’t need bigger screens that are uncomfortable to hold using one hand, I need a phone that can fit well into my small hands with a firm grip. I don’t need fancy external aesthetics, all I need is a simple and clean design that looks great. I don’t need Apple to make drastic changes and come up with a so called revolutionary phone every other year, not when they have already given me the best in the market. All I need is a phone that I can trust and rely on, made by a company that focuses on the user experience.

Its probably the object that you use most in your life. Its the product that you have with you all the time. With this unique relationship, we take changing it really seriously. We don’t want to just make a new phone, we want to make a much better phone. – Jony Ive

And that is why, I’ve been using an iPhone for years and will continue to do so. Because “I’ve had enough of dating the bad boys and this is the man I’m gonna marry”.

Filler

You know how animes often has fillers? I’m reluctant to skip one day of my 30 days challenge (after all this is already the second last post!) yet I’m absolutely exhausted and I really just want to play with my new iPhone 5s. So here’s a filler.

Woke up really excited and started randomly singing this:

I’ve gotta feeling that tonight’s gonna be a good night 
That tonight’s gonna be a good night 
That tonight’s gonna be a good good night 

Tonight’s the night 
Let’s live it up 
I got my money 
Let’s spend it up 

Only to realize it shortly after that the lyrics were completely apt since I made an appointment to get my phone in the evening! I even dressed up in grey with black accessories to match my new space grey phone! Hurhur.

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I haven’t had the chance to play with it much but so far, I am in love with the Touch ID. It has worked every single time for me! It does seems to be working faster as well. So yep, BYE.

Oh and here’s one of the best articles written about this release:

http://daringfireball.net/2013/09/the_iphone_5s_and_5c

 

 

What if money was no object? – Alan Watts

Thought provoking: http://zenpencils.com/comic/98-alan-watts-what-if-money-was-no-object/

What would you like to do if money were no object?

I’d like to see the world for once
All standing hand in hand
And hear them echo through the hills
For peace throughout the land

I would like to travel, to read, to learn multiple languages, to take photographs and to write. None of which I am particularly good at (for now) because I’ve always been stopping myself from putting in too much effort. I’ve been (in a way) molded by society to be on the constant chase for money. Not that I’ve been doing very well in that too.

Life’s reminder that you’ll get nowhere, not here nor there, if you do not enjoy what you’re doing.

Then again, I do enjoy what I’m doing. It is not what I want to do most – travel, but it is not something that I dislike or dread doing either.  In fact, it actually provides me with the funds to do what I like – travel. The paradox.

I suppose this is where people would then make a decision to take a gap year or a sabbatical, to venture out for a year and attempt to pursue their dreams. The worst case scenario? One could fail and simply return to the rat race AFTER having had the experience of your life. At least you would now be without (or at least lesser) regrets and always being haunted by what ifs.

So that’s that. Looking forward to a year of exploring (a part) of the world, reading slowly with a cup of coffee, practicing foreign languages, actually waiting for hours or taking 100 shots just to capture the moment and genuinely putting in thoughts, time and energy to write. Not the kind of photo posts I’ve been churning out in my 30 days challenge.

Meanwhile, I think I am getting a little better at repressing the urge to conform to the norm.

www.teesforall.com_images_Pinky_Brain_To_Do_List_Gray_Shirt

Do not step on the cirrus clouds

Some of you might have seen this sign at East Coast Park in Singapore.

Do not step on the cirrus clouds

And just below it is one of my favorite poems.

Why A Man Cannot Have Wings
Alfian bin Sa’at

Because he will crash land on his head, assuming it to be
The strongest part of his body.

Because someone will put up a sign that reads:
Do Not Step on the Cirrus Clouds.

Because it does not even take a man hundreds of feet above
Sea-level to learn contempt.

Because there will be new categories of handicaps: bow-wings,
Ostrich disease, scaly feathers, carousel flight syndrome,
Or at a freak show: The Amazing Wingless Wonder.

Because he will have a new weapon, gravity,
And everything he releases becomes a missile,
Even glass marbles, books, the fatal music box.

Because he is lonely enough without being able to
Frame the house he lives in between his forefinger and thumb.

Because then the sky will shed its metaphors of freedom
And become another path for him to carry his burdens.

Because there will be a popular form of suicide:
Flying into foreign airspace and being gunned down;
All it takes is a nose-tip to press an invisible blue button.

Because each death in mid-air, each comic comet plunge,
Will be another enactment of the fall of Man.

Because in concentration camps people will break wings
And use the feathers for quills to write sonnets
And pillow stuffing for innocent dreams.

Because he will have less to fantasize about, less of miracles
And the word ‘levitation’ will not exist.

Because there will be children who will empty their bladders
Under cloud cover in an attempt to make yellow snow.

And because he might get the wrong notion that he is closer
To heaven, when he has not even come to a mile
Within the presence of angels, despite the resemblance.

Some times I wonder, is mankind trying to hard to go against nature with their efforts for the greater good? Perhaps it was never meant to be this way.

The advancement of medicine, saving and prolonging lives leading to over population and thus taking a toll on our earth. Technology and television that teaches our young the wrong things, planting violence in their heads, increasing their knowledge and at the same time their wants. Resulting in discontentment with what they have.

We have so much more than what others used to have years ago. But are we happier? What happened to the simple joys in life?

Or perhaps, it was meant to be this way. Since everything happens for a reason.

 

Failure is constructive

Read this on Google+ this morning:

I genuinely believe no one has ever learned anything from success. Success is like a really distorting mirror – Moby 

Read more

While I disagree that no one has ever learned anything from success (I’m a strong believer that you can learn from everything that happens if you have the right mindset), I agree that one can learn much more from failures. If only, you pick yourself up, look at what went wrong objectively and take actions to correct them.

You have failed only when you stop trying and this is why I have utmost respect for Steve Jobs. Besides being a genius and a visionary, he had extreme determination and perseverance in what he believed in. How many of us give up the first, second or third time we fail? Not to say being kicked out of a company he created. Many would have probably sunk into depression, drugs, alcohol and what not. But not him, despite all, he continued to work towards what he believed in. Harry Potter would not have been such an astounding success (imagine a world without Harry Potter) if J K Rowling had given up the first 12 times she faced rejection from publishers.

My point(s) is (are):

  • Never stop believing in yourself just because you did not succeed this time round
  • You have only failed when you stop trying, so never stop trying
  • Learn from each time that you’ve not succeed

So here’s to failure, one of life’s greatest teacher.

When something ends something begins
but now it’s just the end of the road,
When someone loses someone wins
but now it’s just the end of the road
don’t get to fix it if it doesn’t break,
But now it’s just the end of the road
when you gotta leave it makes you wanna stay
i know it’s the end of the road

Never stop doing the things that make you happy

I’ma do the things that I wanna do
I ain’t got a thing to prove to you
I eat my candy with the pork and beans
Excuse my manners if I make a scene

It’s always easy to say that I don’t give a damn about what people think. In fact, I do. I hate to admit that I am very much affected by the judgements of others.  It takes a conscious effort, actually really hard work, to remember what makes me happy – not the society.

Today’s reminder: To never stop myself from doing the things that make me happy, regardless of what others may think.

One tiny step at a time.

Diving in Maldives

The girl with (partial) pink hair, finally

I’ve always wanted pink hair. Always. Thus the title of the blog.

There was of course, 1001 reasons for me to not do so.

I didn’t want to ruin my hair.
My work wouldn’t allow me to have pink hair.
What if it doesn’t suit me.
It is incredibly expensive.
I don’t think pink goes well with my skin tone.

And what not.

Yesterday, I felt really pleased with my hair cut and decided to take the plunge (what plunge you say?). As it turns out, the 1001 reasons not to do so really didn’t matter at all.

I am incredibly happy with my (partial) pink hair and I feel absolutely blessed to be working for a company where I will not be judged for having pink hair.

This 24 hours of giddy happiness brought about by simply having pink hair (yes I’m that easily happy) made me wonder, what took me so long? Why did I spend years contemplating and wanting something which could be done easily and definitely within my means?

LF once said that he doesn’t understand why I always seem to restrain and limit myself. I don’t understand why either.

And so, I hereby lift all restraints I’ve subconsciously placed on myself (waves magic wand) and will now consciously make an effort to never stop doing things that make me happy.

What is the worse thing that could happen? If it is something I could live with, what’s stopping me then?

Point of this post? I am finally, the girl with (partial) pink hair.

🙂

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To live by, in 2013

Saw this on Google+ this morning and I thought it seemed pretty aligned with how I want to live my life in 2013:

1) If it feels wrong, don’t do it.

2) Say “exactly” what you mean.

3) Don’t be a people pleaser.

4) Trust your instincts.

5) Never speak bad about yourself.

6) Never give up on your dreams.

7) Don’t be afraid to say No.

8) Be kind to yourself.

9) Let go of what you can’t control

10) Stay away from drama and negativity as much as possible

Ending this post with my favorite shot from Christmas this year.

Christmas 2012

Here’s to a great year ahead! *clinks glasses of ribena